Joined at the Rib
Joined
at the Rib
My
husband and I are virtually inseparable. We do almost everything together.
Where he goes, I go and vice versa. His job requires him to travel around the
world and sometimes we have to pick up at the drop of a hat and move, I go with
him. His family lives 4 hours away from mine, when he goes to visit them I go.
Unless there is an appointment that one of has to make that cannot be
rescheduled, we are always in the same place at the same times. Some may call
this excessive, but I call it full-proof.
Mark 10:9 says “let no one split apart what God has
joined together (NLT)”. Most people understand this to mean that they will not
ever become divorced and have anyone interfere with their marriage. However, I
am more inclined to say that God also meant this literally. When God created
Eve, he removed Adam’s rib and she was made from his body. Adam stated in
Genesis 2:23 “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh (NLT)!”.
That’s right; God took one body and one soul and made two. Adam and Eve were
part of one another. When one soul is missing a portion of it, it will long to
be near it at all times. Why subject yourself to unnecessary heartache? For the
first 2 years of our marriage, I thought I had this figured out.
I am no way indicating that the world has to adopt
my way of thinking. Each couple has to make their marriage work for them,
according to the word of God. I have tried it other ways and found that it
didn’t work out the way we expected. Initially, we decided to live separately
for the majority of the basketball season in order to get ahead financially. We
thought that two incomes would be better than one and we could accomplish our
long term goals a lot sooner. I had always been extremely independent and the
idea of following a man around the world, although he is my husband, was
frightening. I would have to totally depend on him and trust him, no matter
what! I was afraid of the financial instability that his profession was known
for. I was more comfortable living in the United States and having steady,
lucrative income 12 months out of the year. The reality was I was just fine
with visiting my husband 2 weeks while he was gone and spending the summer
evenings with him. Since I worked a full time job, I was unable to take summers
off to even spend that time with him. It was like living a double life; I had become
accustomed to living alone and I had to adjust to him being at home. However,
since he was only home 2-3 months out of the year by the time I would make the
adjustments to him being home it was time for him to leave again. And instead
of getting ahead financially, we found ourselves struggling. This was hard for
either of us to fathom but when we took a look at our expenses, I was spending
a large amount of money on entertainment and travel. I was lonely so I
frequently would travel four hours to see my family and friends while also
entertaining myself when I couldn’t see them. What we were trying so hard to
accomplish was evading us.
It took a tragedy in our lives for us to realize
that we were never going to get ahead in our relationship doing it our way.
Before we made a final decision, we met with our Pastor and he gave us the best
advice I have ever received. He told us, your marriage is like your house. The
door is closed and everyone who belongs there is inside and anyone trying to
come in has to get your permission to come in. You can’t stop people from
knocking but you have the choice whether to let them in or not. When you are
apart, you still have the framework of your house but you leave the door
cracked. The crack may not be visible but when someone comes to knock on the
door, they will see it was never secure. The cracked door welcomes others in
without you even noticing. You can always reseal a cracked door, but why take
the chance of unwanted visitors coming in.
This is one of the reasons we do so many things
together. It does not guarantee that we will not have problems but what it does
ensure is that we don’t have any uninvited guests. Why worry about kicking
people or things out when you could have avoided them being there from the
beginning?
With All My Love,
Mrs. Truscott
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