Saved...and Still Single!

Each season of life brings different lessons and tools for us to use at later points. We get information that will help us solve a problem that would have otherwise stumped us. It’s study time to pass the test that we know will come in the future. Most of the time we take joy in being fully equipped for the next phase. If you’re single, you’ve heard every cliché about what this time is about in your life. When your heart longs to share with another, there is little to be said to comfort you. I want to offer a different perspective on the importance of preparation. Have you been studying for the right exam or just the pop quiz?

How many times have we prayed for God to bless us with something or someone only to begin worshiping the gift instead of the giver? When you’re studying anything, the concept should be to gain new knowledge; not just to get a passing grade. But most of us have not mastered that concept. We have developed a sense of accomplishment and in our timeline we should receive the prize for our good behavior. We do everything God tells us to do and stop doing the things He tells us break His heart. But why? Is it to get something out of God or just because we love Him? When you start seeing God as your ATM machine, you have ceased to obey out of love but from manipulation.

Proverbs 16:9 A man's heart plans his way: but the LORD directs his steps.

Being single is when you learn to put your plans under His direction. Having desires is not wrong but when those desires become more important than the directions God gives is the problem. God knows all, sees all, and knows the end from the beginning. You may be telling God that your clock is ticking and you should be married by now but God is saying you should have learned how to be obedient by now, how to submit, how to serve me, how to keep my commandments, how to be loved by and how to love me. Have you showed God that following His directions are more important than your plans?

No, being single is not a punishment for misbehaving.

It is a training ground and a temperature gauge. Are you desperate for God or a husband? It may surprise you, but some of you may never get married. Not because you’re not worthy or God doesn’t love you but because He has greater use for you as a single woman. In 1 Corinthians 7:7-9 Paul says 7“For I would that all men were even as I myself (unmarried). But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows. It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9 But if they cannot contain let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.” (Emphasis mine). That’s right; the apostle Paul teaches us that some of us have been given the “gift of singleness”. Whether this gift is permanent or temporary is unknown, but nevertheless it is a gift.

Our problem is that we’re too busy telling God how to bless us that we miss out on His blessing. If He hasn’t chosen to allow you to be married there is still a purpose for your singleness. Marriage is a blessing, only in the right season. Just as anything else, if you’re not ready for it or mature enough you will ruin it. Being effective at one level is not being complacent, it’s being responsible. Whatever, however God chooses to gift you is His prerogative. The way you handle it lets Him know He can trust you with more. If He can’t trust you to be faithful to Him in your singleness, why would He give you more in a marriage? Would you give your child an Ipad if they tear up the calculator or don’t appreciate the calculator? I would hope that the answer would be “no”. That doesn’t mean that you hate your child, it means you love them enough to see them appreciate a blessing on their level.

Life does not have to go according to your plans but they do have to follow God’s direction. Sure, people get married against the will of the Lord and are even successful. But do you want successful or sacred? Dear heart, I know it’s hard when you have a desire to be married…to have a man to love you like Christ loves the church. But, he should be worth the wait. The perfecting wait, the preparing wait, the promising wait of the Lord.

Philippians 4:11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.

You can be content without becoming complacent. You have to be able to tell the Lord that you want more but you trust Him if this is what He has in His plans for your life. Don’t be so consumed with your plans that you miss His direction. You never know where He will lead you or who He will lead you to. Although you may be Saved, and still single but are you submitted? Submitted to the direction that God has for your life.

With All My Love,
Mrs. Truscott